In My 45th Year...

Greetings, Blog Friends!

A warm Saturday night here in Naples, Maine. This weekend the staff has really been put to the test as it is one of most sought after weekends of the Summer. They (and I) are holding up well, despite the warm weather. I am proud of all their efforts.

This past Wednesday was my 45th birthday. While I don't consider it a "milestone" by any means, it was a day, and week, that reinforced that having good friends makes Life all worth while! Astra, the inn's gardener/breakfast server/housekeeper made me a delicious Carrot-Raisin Cake with Cream Cheese Frosting. She admittedly doctored up a boxed cake mix but added shredded carrots and raisin and topped it with a luscious icing (you know how I am all about taking a simple recipe and playing with variations!). Andi, another one of my wonderful servers and housekeepers, made me a cute card featuring one of her Mom's many cats. The message inside almost made me teary-eyed. Her Mom, Wanda, made a personal appearance to the inn with some locally-picked Maine blueberries in a jar--always a treat!

Of course there were the numerous e-mails, e-cards, and phone calls from friends from the past. They all meant the world to me.

At this busy point of the Summer, and I guess this applies to most innkeepers, it is challenging to make plans with friends and family. Serving guests and keeping the inn tidy is all that we have on our plates at this time. It is what I remind myself daily: "Game On!"

One of the interesting things that comes to mind, perhaps not just on birthdays, is how we surround ourselves with people in our lives that don't merely accept our flaws, they inspire us to change by their example and their loving advice. It is my belief that friends that approve of us in all our "dysfunctional traits" don't really care for us that much at all. They play it safe, not wanting to rock the boat. They shy away from intimacy at any costs to keep our friendships. Perhaps they also cannot express themselves and afraid of conflict in the relationship.

True friends, however, make the loving choice (and it is a choice) to be totally honest with us. Only then can intimacy be found, I have found. This remains on my mind this week at this step in a 45-year old path. Can you discern between the people in your Life who just "deal with your flaws" and those who want you to grow out of them? This takes risk, and depth of intimacy, and lots of uncompromising Love!

Thankfully, I now surround myself with the latter (and this is something that took many years to experience!) It took me a lot of heartache to make the choice to remove the former from my Life and to wish them well on their own journey.

Wrapping up the day here at the inn. I hope everyone's Summer is going really well. Thanks for reading the Inn at Long Lake blog!

Keith A. Neubert

Innkeeper-Chef